Jingle go away?

Hello my fellow stitchers. Apologies for the extended absence but I'm here, you are here. I have been sewing the most painful of projects and its sucked all my sewing joy out of me, leaving me a frayed selvedge husk of my former self. That led my to think of dreaded sewing tasks and that led me to Christmas. Yes, it's approaching like The Landoliers munching away....a little sound of Mud... can be heard like a whisper on the approach. You are soon going to be bombarded with cinnamon and tinsel until you bleed. Until the thought of a mince pie makes you want to hurl. You will be abused by dark nights and Chris Rea's driving home at christmas on Smooth. Every. Goddamn. Night. You will also start thinking of all those gifts you are going to sew for your friends and family.

Let's have a little chat about that most forbidden of Taboos: a sewists Chrrrrrriiiiiistmas.

It seems every year, we all hide from it until the 15th of December and its like "Open that Bailey's, Doreen. It's the season to be jolly". Except Doreen isn't to be seen, you can hear the faint whirling of her sewing machine and as you survey the immediate crash site outside of her craft room, you step over the discarded wrappers of Cadbury's roses, there is a distant smell of sweat and desperation, you can hear some faint swearing. Darren can't enjoy the Bailey's. Doreen supped it for her tea. Doreen is exhausted because she has 20 gift bags to do for her colleagues and she has bleed on 6 of them. She is wondering if the she can sell the stain as a fabric fault. Little Stevie has to dress as a donkey-octopus-sheep for the Navity and she needs to make the costume. Stevie has inexplicable decided he will not wear it unless the fur is neon green. Doreen is awaiting the Amazon delivery with the dye. Darren also helpfully dropped off some pants for hemming ready for the party season. She didn't buy a dress because she planned to make that Vogue dress pattern and seduce Darren in a swell of Yuletide passion. She is faintly plotting now whether Sainsbury's TU sale aisle has anything left with a sequin on it. She hasn't bought Darren, Shirley or her mother a gift because she bought the material for some of those great 10 projects to make for christmas. And now the sense of failure is starting to cause her to regret every decision she has made since October. Also, she cannot find Maris Pipers for the love of satan....

Does this even sound even vaguely familiar? Just a tinge?

I have been there. Sewing every night. Starting to hate my sewing machine. Figuring that I am better skilled than last year, I can bend the time continuum now. And I did this all to myself. For what reason? I cannot recollect anyone in my life requesting this. So its the desire to craft something special for a loved one. It comes from love. But let's pause for a moment. Let's think of the stress that we are creating for ourselves. You might, might make something that someone will know the effort, time and expense may appreciate. Or you might not....It might never get used and you have a little ball of resentment burning away everytime you see it casually cast aside on a shelf. Now, those happy christmas types might say, its about the process, you know. Well, fuck that. I want people to need the smelling salts over my awesome scarf, to wax lyrical about how much I have come on since last year, exclaim how it has changed their life. I will not get that. So this blog is a little reminder to myself not to fall for it. Watch others and marvel in their skills, enjoy the blogs/vlogs and posts but, no, I will not be drawn into the glitter and shit fest this year.

I stopped making gifts apart from select gifts for those who actually SEW. Because they get it. They know, they have been in the trenches as well. They have the sellotape scared tongue and puckers of fingers holding fat quarters in their hands for too long.

I am planning 2 special sewing gifts this year. 1 for a friend and the rest for me. I will hole myself away and hold my zoom christmas do in that vogue dress and feel fabulous for me. And, I pretty much guarantee everyone around you will notice how much happier you are for it this season.

Remember this is supposed to be fun. The moment it stops being fun, stop and open you your internet browser and buy something.

Darren will give you a hug and give you a mince pie and you can bask in that faint glow not giving a crap.